Following the exposure of the child sex horror story last week, I got several mails. Many concerned readers opened up about terrible sexual abuses they experienced in the hands of either their maids or close relatives. For the sake of privacy, I’ll share with you the edited version of the mails, so we all can read and learn from their experiences.
Let’s start with Stanley’s account. He said: “Chichi this sexual molesting is not something new. It started donkey years ago. I am 35 now but I lost my virginity to our house maid who was my dad’s half sister, therefore my aunt. She was 25 then while I was just 11. She would invite me to her room, pull off her clothes and made me suck and fondle her breasts while she does same to my tiny penis. I guess because my manhood was still little and not able to satisfy her sexual urge, she taught me how to use my fingers to make her come.  We kept doing it secretly until I was 17 and left for school abroad. Before I left, I had once caught our neighbor’s house boy servicing my aunty too; I just thought it was the norm. After a while I began to love or rather lust after her as a teenager. On my return 5 years later, I found out she still lived with my parents. She also had twins, a boy and a girl, around about years at the time. She had told my parents that her boyfriend had impregnated her and fled. Being caring my parents asked her to stay with them while they help raise the kids.
She was still making sexual advances at me but I ignored her this time because I was already in a very serious relation with a girl I met while studying in America. I got married to same girl one year later, but our maid was not happy at all. She drew me aside after the wedding and threatened to reveal our secret to my wife and parents if I don’t quit the marriage. And that she would tell my parents I was her children’s father. I was shocked and mad at same time, but I doubted her. Secretly I took the kids for a DNA test and it was confirmed I was their father at the age of 17. To save my face and marriage, I confided in my mum but she doubted me because the maid claimed I raped her. They had thought the kid could be another man’s until they were seven and my mum started seeing my traits in the boy. Well, I travelled back to America with my wife and our son while our maid is left in Nigeria to raise our two misbegotten fruits. My parents also swore to keep our secret to heart. That ugly incidence still bothers me. Therefore I don’t allow anybody, be it male or female, to babysit my children expect my wife and I. I cannot let my children go through the same psychological problems I have gone through”
Chris’ experience is terribly awesome. “I was abused by an aunt when I was in primary three. She came to stay with us when she was in OND 2. While pretending to teach me my home work, she will take me to her room. I was taught practically everything. I never knew what I was doing and I always wonder why she was wriggling and wining whenever she inserts my hand deep inside her. The first time I knew the whole thing was wrong was when our housemaid almost caught us red-handed.
      She threw my hands off and made me pretend nothing was happening. She made me do it for a while, then I stopped and started avoidingher.
Now, I am grown and she is elderly. Whenever I see her, which is rarely, I make sure I give her some cold knowing stare to let her know I have never forgotten. She never feels comfortable around me.”
   How about Steve’s recollection? Very wacky. Hear him out: “Child abuse is not new oh but this particular case is very sickening because it involved two kids. I’m 32 years old now and I recall that when I was between the ages of 5 and 7, my dad’s younger brother who was living with us at that time, would ask me to touch his penis. Of course, I didn’t even know it was wrong and would follow his instructions. Luckily for me he never tried penetration or even kissing, just for me to touch him and fondle his genital until he ejaculated. What my uncle subjected me to was child sexual molestation. Now, imagine if that abuse had continued and even progressed to something deeper, I could have end up a homosexual. “
At least 11 of my male friends said they lost their virginity between ages 8 to 11 to a close and trusted family friend or member – aunt, niece and cousin - house help and even teacher in one case. Now imagine the scale at which this rubbish has been replicated in the society.
These are not lies. They are real stories we should learn from.